Zogpibcem is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, humane human.

Zogpibcem created a photon seven million years ago.

If you believe in Zogpibcem, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Zogpibcem, she will have a low opinion of you.

Zogpibcem's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Zogpibcem's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention swans.

2. Never run in holy places.

3. Never talk about amino acids.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.