Nutomintun is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, idiotic newt.

Nutomintun created the Milkyway two billion years ago.

If you believe in Nutomintun, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Nutomintun, it will cry a lot.

Nutomintun's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Nutomintun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Always treat eagles with great respect.

3. Never wear white rings.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.