Bomvagflytig is a god.

It takes the form of a large, selfish tapir.

Bomvagflytig created humanity four million years ago.

If you believe in Bomvagflytig, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Bomvagflytig, it will boil you in a big pot.

Bomvagflytig's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Bomvagflytig's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from white tapirs, for they are unholy.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never go into orange rooms.

4. Do not kill snakes.

5. Bomvagflytig loves voles, so they must be respected.