Dimcadjamtof is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, passionate lobster.

Dimcadjamtof created water seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Dimcadjamtof, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Dimcadjamtof, she will turn you into a plant.

Dimcadjamtof's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Dimcadjamtof's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never laugh in the presence of dogs.

3. Never wear jumpers.

4. Do not wear pink clothing.

5. Never talk about planets.