Dimsad is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, capable octopus.

Dimsad created silver four billion years ago.

If you believe in Dimsad, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Dimsad, he will jump up and down on your head.

Dimsad's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Dimsad's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Dimsad.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Retreat if five shrews approach from the west.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not drink alcohol.