Tarbitpod is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, selfish deer.

Tarbitpod created the Large Magellanic Cloud four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tarbitpod, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Tarbitpod, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Tarbitpod's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Tarbitpod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Run away if seven squirrels approach from the south.

4. Do not wear cyan clothing.

5. Never mention sheep.