Bedgetsog is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, unthoughtful ferret.

Bedgetsog created dark energy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bedgetsog, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bedgetsog, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Bedgetsog's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Bedgetsog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat spinach.

2. Do not hurt dogs.

3. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

4. Do not bounce in public.

5. Do not make images of living things.