Fudbafsitloop is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, compassionate tapir.

Fudbafsitloop created energy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fudbafsitloop, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Fudbafsitloop, he will try to impress you with trees.

Fudbafsitloop's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Fudbafsitloop's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear indigo shorts.

2. Run away if five sharks approach from the east.

3. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

4. Put Fudbafsitloop first in all things.

5. Never think about the weak nuclear force.