Govpogvan Mutmifcam is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, ruthless fox.

Govpogvan Mutmifcam created light four years ago.

If you believe in Govpogvan Mutmifcam, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Govpogvan Mutmifcam, it will cry a lot.

Govpogvan Mutmifcam's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Govpogvan Mutmifcam's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick tortoises.

2. Erect three silver sculptures of Govpogvan Mutmifcam on top of important buildings.

3. Never think ill of sick porpoises.

4. You must pray to Govpogvan Mutmifcam seven times a day.

5. Do not shave your legs.