Jenlipstikcib is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, irritating beaver.

Jenlipstikcib created the planet Saturn six billion years ago.

If you believe in Jenlipstikcib, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Jenlipstikcib, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Jenlipstikcib's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Jenlipstikcib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Jenlipstikcib must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Always help sick geese.

5. You must pray to Jenlipstikcib nine times a day.