Flanxemarfbidfob is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, dishonest wolf.

Flanxemarfbidfob created Mount Everest two billion years ago.

If you believe in Flanxemarfbidfob, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Flanxemarfbidfob, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Flanxemarfbidfob's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Flanxemarfbidfob's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

2. Flanxemarfbidfob loves seals, so they must be respected.

3. Flanxemarfbidfob loves snails, so they must be honoured.

4. Never talk about nebulae.

5. You must never eat aubergines.