Tofnulltarppod is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, merciless fish.

Tofnulltarppod created an atom six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tofnulltarppod, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Tofnulltarppod, it will turn you into a rock.

Tofnulltarppod's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Tofnulltarppod's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if nine geese approach from the north.

2. Erect a large iron sculpture of Tofnulltarppod on top of all buildings.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Never talk about squirrels.

5. Do not drink water in brown rooms.