Yaksogman is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, selfish deer.

Yaksogman created the world two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yaksogman, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Yaksogman, he will jump up and down on your head.

Yaksogman's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Yaksogman's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt mice.

2. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.