Flytinfen Dutvilvol is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, moody otter.

Flytinfen Dutvilvol created viruses nine million years ago.

If you believe in Flytinfen Dutvilvol, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Flytinfen Dutvilvol, he will try to impress you with trees.

Flytinfen Dutvilvol's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Flytinfen Dutvilvol's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.