Jatgargat Rultonkjaddob is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, unsympathetic jellyfish.

Jatgargat Rultonkjaddob created viruses three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jatgargat Rultonkjaddob, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Jatgargat Rultonkjaddob, he will remove you from existence.

Jatgargat Rultonkjaddob's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Jatgargat Rultonkjaddob's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Always look after injured sheep.

5. Never eat bark.