Spagcipspag is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, unjust seal.

Spagcipspag created time and space five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Spagcipspag, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Spagcipspag, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Spagcipspag's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Spagcipspag's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick badgers.

2. You must pray to Spagcipspag three times a day.

3. Do not take Spagcipspag's name in vain.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.