Nulontsterfobwik is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, thoughtless tortoise.

Nulontsterfobwik created the Milkyway five billion years ago.

If you believe in Nulontsterfobwik, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nulontsterfobwik, it will try to impress you with trees.

Nulontsterfobwik's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Nulontsterfobwik's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Do not wear gold on your body.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

4. Do not dye your hair black.

5. Run away from violet goats, for they are unholy.