Bastpagjap is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, selfish dingo.

Bastpagjap created a Higgs boson four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bastpagjap, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bastpagjap, it will turn you into a rock.

Bastpagjap's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Bastpagjap's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no ducks in a room before entering it.

2. You must never eat lemons.

3. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never talk about cell theory.