Tafcuss is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, self-confident donkey.

Tafcuss created humankind three million years ago.

If you believe in Tafcuss, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Tafcuss, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Tafcuss' most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Tafcuss' Holy Commandments

1. Never feed carrots to grasshopers while wearing red rings.

2. Always help eagles in need.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Feed all hungry otters.

5. Never eat bread.