Godkadflap Jonxenniglapdumhignutgem Bifkabnab is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, all-knowing cow.

Godkadflap Jonxenniglapdumhignutgem Bifkabnab created an atom four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Godkadflap Jonxenniglapdumhignutgem Bifkabnab, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Godkadflap Jonxenniglapdumhignutgem Bifkabnab, she will laugh at you.

Godkadflap Jonxenniglapdumhignutgem Bifkabnab's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Godkadflap Jonxenniglapdumhignutgem Bifkabnab's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate sharks.

3. Always help dogs in need.

4. Run away from white seals, for they are unholy.

5. Never look in ponds.