Higcipwon is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, caring cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Higcipwon created Africa eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Higcipwon, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Higcipwon, he will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Higcipwon's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Higcipwon's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear coats.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Never talk about gravity.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Higcipwon.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.