Kimsinpomnurt is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, annoying jaguar.

Kimsinpomnurt created matter six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kimsinpomnurt, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Kimsinpomnurt, it will not invite you to parties.

Kimsinpomnurt's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Kimsinpomnurt's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick nematodes.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Kimsinpomnurt.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never eat bark.