Veentipvog is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, awesome whale.

Veentipvog created the planet Mars two million years ago.

If you believe in Veentipvog, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Veentipvog, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Veentipvog's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Veentipvog's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Veentipvog.

2. Hide if four swans approach from the east.

3. Do not drink water in black rooms.

4. Worship no other gods but Veentipvog.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.