Narlnadhad is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, stupid crab.

Narlnadhad created the planet Mars four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Narlnadhad, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Narlnadhad, it will turn you into a duck.

Narlnadhad's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Narlnadhad's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if four snails approach from the north.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Always look after injured dogs.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Always help tapirs in need.