Japjiphinarm is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, effective wasp.

Japjiphinarm created an electron seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Japjiphinarm, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Japjiphinarm, he will make you grow a tail.

Japjiphinarm's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Japjiphinarm's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry otters.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always help sick frogs.

5. Do not trade with those who eat pineapples.