Vag is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, unthoughtful bat.

Vag created humankind eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Vag, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Vag, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Vag's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Vag's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about asteroids.

2. Never write about galaxies.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. Do not listen to music.