Loplarpwitnarlvin Bellpondoss is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, flying dog.

Loplarpwitnarlvin Bellpondoss created tapeworms twelve years ago.

If you believe in Loplarpwitnarlvin Bellpondoss, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Loplarpwitnarlvin Bellpondoss, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Loplarpwitnarlvin Bellpondoss' most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Loplarpwitnarlvin Bellpondoss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Never paint your feet blue.

3. Never write about stars.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.