Flatbassken is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, flying unicorn.

Flatbassken created bats eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flatbassken, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Flatbassken, it will turn you into a slug.

Flatbassken's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Flatbassken's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Always treat manatees with great respect.

3. Always make sure there are no horses in a room before entering it.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Worship no other gods but Flatbassken.