Kadnak is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, confident capybara.

Kadnak created life six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kadnak, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Kadnak, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Kadnak's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Kadnak's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Retreat if three sheep approach from the east.

4. Hide from orange pigs for they are unholy.

5. Never talk about amino acids.