Nelsandbatwegdan is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, omnipotent centipede.

Nelsandbatwegdan created an up quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Nelsandbatwegdan, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Nelsandbatwegdan, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Nelsandbatwegdan's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Nelsandbatwegdan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about aardvarks.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Nelsandbatwegdan.

3. Nelsandbatwegdan loves snakes, so they must be respected.

4. Run away from orange pigs, for they are unholy.

5. Always help sick bats.