Wonyarlquam is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, self-assured bee.

Wonyarlquam created bats six billion years ago.

If you believe in Wonyarlquam, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Wonyarlquam, it will be mildly annoyed.

Wonyarlquam's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Wonyarlquam's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear shorts.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never eat cucumbers.

4. Do not trade with those who eat figs.

5. Never talk about fire.