Wankamtun Kimcadkar is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, merciless tapir.

Wankamtun Kimcadkar created the Black Eye Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wankamtun Kimcadkar, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Wankamtun Kimcadkar, she will try to impress you with trees.

Wankamtun Kimcadkar's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Wankamtun Kimcadkar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never think about comets.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Wankamtun Kimcadkar.