Bastvigdog is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, awesome dolphin.

Bastvigdog created Europe three billion years ago.

If you believe in Bastvigdog, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Bastvigdog, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Bastvigdog's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Bastvigdog's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not wear carbon on your body.

3. You must never eat apples.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never mention whales.