Hivratkom is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, unsympathetic chicken.

Hivratkom created water seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hivratkom, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Hivratkom, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Hivratkom's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Hivratkom's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bread.

2. Run away from purple shrews, for they are unholy.

3. Never think ill of sick grasshopers.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.