Natsugpop Veenrigrag is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, all-powerful guinea pig.

Natsugpop Veenrigrag created a photon three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Natsugpop Veenrigrag, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Natsugpop Veenrigrag, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Natsugpop Veenrigrag's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Natsugpop Veenrigrag's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Always make sure there are no frogs in a room before entering it.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always help tortoises in need.

5. Never talk about cell theory.