Labkabtip is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, caring dugong.

Labkabtip created humankind four million years ago.

If you believe in Labkabtip, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Labkabtip, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Labkabtip's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Labkabtip's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Labkabtip's priests.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Never talk about asteroids.

4. Do not wear indigo clothing.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Labkabtip.