Zenbifquim is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, dishonourable toad.

Zenbifquim created Mount Everest four billion years ago.

If you believe in Zenbifquim, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Zenbifquim, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Zenbifquim's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Zenbifquim's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Always help capybaras in need.

5. Do not kill sharks.