Nakkiphas is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, quiet rat.

Nakkiphas created time and space nine million years ago.

If you believe in Nakkiphas, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Nakkiphas, he will turn you into a sheep.

Nakkiphas' most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Nakkiphas' Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Always make sure there are no foxes in a building before entering it.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nakkiphas.