Homfoncan is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, boastful penguin.

Homfoncan created everything that exists five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Homfoncan, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Homfoncan, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Homfoncan's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Homfoncan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your back.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Homfoncan.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Put Homfoncan first in all things.