Botfebmeg is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, loving yak.

Botfebmeg created dark energy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Botfebmeg, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Botfebmeg, it will turn you into a puffin.

Botfebmeg's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Botfebmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not speak about nuts.

3. Never feed garlic to nematodes while wearing blue shoes.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.