Getarpkap is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, unthoughtful alligator.

Getarpkap created the Milkyway seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Getarpkap, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Getarpkap, it will not care.

Getarpkap's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Getarpkap's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Do not wear red clothing.

4. Getarpkap must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Always treat turtles with great respect.