Yattbigkon is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, intelligent pig.

Yattbigkon created the Virgo Supercluster five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yattbigkon, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Yattbigkon, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Yattbigkon's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Yattbigkon's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in the presence of foxes.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Always look after injured dogs.

5. Always take life seriously.