Natgeblakboss is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, resourceful cow.

Natgeblakboss created matter two billion years ago.

If you believe in Natgeblakboss, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Natgeblakboss, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Natgeblakboss' most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Natgeblakboss' Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. You must never eat corn.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.