Faswotvad is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, prudent squirrel.

Faswotvad created Africa five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Faswotvad, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Faswotvad, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Faswotvad's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Faswotvad's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Put Faswotvad first in all things.

3. You must love Faswotvad.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.