Haktargken is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, contented alligator.

Haktargken created time and space six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Haktargken, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Haktargken, she will think nothing of it.

Haktargken's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Haktargken's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about galaxies.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Haktargken.