Kongepwap is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, stupid parrot.

Kongepwap created the Black Eye Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kongepwap, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Kongepwap, she will jump up and down on your head.

Kongepwap's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Kongepwap's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt turtles.

2. Run away if four goats approach from the south.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Kongepwap.

5. Never eat green fruit.