Gunbassid is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, amazing cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Gunbassid created everything that exists seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gunbassid, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Gunbassid, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Gunbassid's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Gunbassid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never talk about mites.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Feed all hungry ants.