Didkindut is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, loving jaguar.

Didkindut created humanity four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Didkindut, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Didkindut, it will not invite you to parties.

Didkindut's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Didkindut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair brown.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Never go into green rooms.

4. Didkindut loves aardvarks, so they must be respected.

5. Always stare at clouds.