Tettipagcuss is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, contented slug.

Tettipagcuss created the planet Jupiter seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tettipagcuss, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Tettipagcuss, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Tettipagcuss' most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Tettipagcuss' Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Do not jump in public.