Flapkonsid Motfedfad is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, wise raccoon.

Flapkonsid Motfedfad created the Virgo Supercluster three billion years ago.

If you believe in Flapkonsid Motfedfad, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Flapkonsid Motfedfad, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Flapkonsid Motfedfad's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Flapkonsid Motfedfad's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not hurt great tits.

3. Hide if six moths approach from the south.

4. Always treat sheep with great respect.

5. Do not shave your head.